Episode•May 6, 2022•38 min

Tiffany's Favorite (100th Episode Edition) | Ep. 100

This is a super special episode, being Tiffany's 100th episode! For this episode, Tiffany rewinds back to one of her personal favorite episodes on the podcast thus far. Tune in to this special episode jam packed with so much important information! Starting next week, the Money Talk with Tiff podcast will be releasing twice a week on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Connect with Tiffany on Social Media Facebook: Money Talk With Tiff Twitter: @moneytalkwitht Instagram: @moneytalkwitht LinkedIn: Tiffany Grant This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis: Podcorn - https://podcorn.com/privacy OP3 - https://op3.dev/privacy

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Key Takeaways

1
Five mental games (deletions, distortions, generalizations, personalizations, dehumanizations) shape how we interpret reality and justify our beliefs
Deletions: selectively ignoring information that doesn't fit our narrative
Distortions: twisting or misinterpreting what others say to suit our story
Generalizations: labeling groups or people to avoid deeper thinking
Personalizations: assuming everything is about us, often leading to feelings of unworthiness
Dehumanizations: stripping humanity from others to justify negative behavior or beliefs
2
These mental games directly impact money decisions, relationships, and self-perception
Money magnifies existing insecurities and ego issues
Generous attribution (seeing the best in others) improves relationships and financial harmony
Being aware of these patterns allows us to catch ourselves and choose differently
3
The question 'What is the story I'm telling myself?' interrupts reactive patterns
This question creates space between stimulus and response
It turns absolute statements into curiosities rather than rigid beliefs
Using this language with others reduces defensiveness and opens dialogue
4
Vulnerability feels like a threat to survival, triggering fight-or-flight responses
Being wrong can feel like losing status in the 'tribe'
Emotional charge signals when ego is taking over
Awareness of this programming helps us respond rather than react

Intro

This is the 100th episode of Money Talk with Tiff, featuring a replay of Tiffany's favorite episode with Anna Lange on the five mental games we play with ourselves.
Anna Lange is an entrepreneur for nearly 20 years who has run seven businesses and founded the Just Project nonprofit helping women of abuse, bullying, and neglect. She runs the Permission to Shift Summit series and is a student of consciousness.

Website Permission to Shift

– Episode Introduction & Announcements

Tiffany celebrates the 100th episode by replaying her favorite episode. Starting next week, the podcast will release twice weekly on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

– Guest Introduction: Anna Lange

Anna Lange joins to discuss the five mental games we play. Tiffany sought her out after hearing her speak at a virtual summit.

– The Five Mental Games Overview

Anna explains these games justify what's happening in our heads and make it true. They can be used negatively to avoid responsibility or positively to see the good in things.

When we play mental games on ourselves, they're games we play to justify whatever's going on in our head and make it true.
– Anna Lange

– Deletions: Ignoring Unwanted Information

Deletions involve removing pieces of information we don't want to see. Generous attribution means thinking the best of what's being said.

Generous attribution means thinking generously about what's happening or what's being said or what's happening around you.
– Anna Lange

– Distortions: Twisting Reality

Distortions involve tweaking or deliberately misinterpreting information. Anna shares a personal story about a conflict with her daughter that escalated through distortions and deletions.

Wait for the charge. The second you feel a charge, is when the ego is kicking in and the need to be right surfaces.
– Anna Lange

– Generalizations: Labeling to Avoid Thinking

Generalizations help us quickly categorize for survival but become problematic when used to avoid deeper thinking. Statements like 'my husband never picks up' disempower others.

– Personalizations: Making Everything About You

Personalizations involve assuming situations are about you, often reinforcing feelings of unworthiness. This is especially toxic for those who tend to feel victimized.

– Dehumanizations: Stripping Humanity from Others

Dehumanizations justify treating others differently by removing their humanity. We often dehumanize those closest to us—spouses, children, parents—to justify controlling behavior.

If you truly believed that your six-year-old or your 18-year-old was really and truly worthy, you wouldn't seek to change them.
– Anna Lange

– The Key Question to Interrupt These Patterns

Anna recommends Brene Brown's question: 'What is the story I'm telling myself?' This creates awareness and opens space for curiosity rather than rigid belief.

Resources

Topics

mental healthpsychologymoney mindsetrelationshipsself-awarenessemotional intelligencepersonal developmentcommunicationcognitive biasesmindfulness